A Lesson I've Really Learned

Throughout most of my life I have heard the same things as the rest of us have about the in-equality between the sexes but it has never been more obvious to me until this year's presidential election. Like most of the rest of the country, I am not only extremely interested in the outcome of this election but I am passionate about the candidates and the issues. To be completely honest though, what I am truly passionate about is my pure hatred of the Democratic Nominee. It even scares me that I am able to feel that emotion and feel it so strongly about another human being. After all, no matter what my views are, Mr. Obama is still a human being and it does bother me that I am able to hate as passionately as I do. This guy scares the living crap out of me. I honestly believe that if he is elected president life as we know it here in the United States is going to be over. I do not trust one thing he says and even the sound of his voice grates on my nerves like fingernails on a blackboard. Okay, there! I have admitted it.

My Blog...My Opinions

And boy do I ever have opinions! But they are mine and since I can say whatever it is that I want to say here, tonight I am going to talk politics and my views. Well, not all of my views, tonight I am going to talk about how I feel about this presidential election and try to get a few things off of my chest. I am more involved and more passionate about this race than I have ever been about any other race in my life. I voted in my first ever primary this year and I was so upset about it because of my stupidity. I am ashamed to admit it, but eight years ago I was so gung-ho on George Bush that I actually registered as a Republican. My grandmother would flip over in her grave if she knew that. but the worst part about it was that since I never did change it I was not allowed to vote for any Democrat in the primary. Thankfully it will not matter in the general election, however that may be a moot point. And being upset about not being able to cast my primary vote for Hillary Clinton definitely did not keep her from winning in North Carolina. I am so ashamed to be living in this state.

Our Irresponsible Press

I am appauled and so disappointed in the media in this country. We are, in my opinion, some of the nosiest people in the entire world and the media only feeds this sick obsession. I don't understand why we feel that it is so important to know everything about celebrities, poloticians and any one else that happens to be in the public eye. It's none of our business what goes on behind the closed doors of these people. I wonder, how many of us private citizens would appreciate the media poking through our garbage, standing outside our homes and taking pictures of us every time we walked out the door. As private citizen we would not stand for it. Why should these people have to endure this kind of scrunity?

I'd also like to talk about his presidential election as an example of the irresponsible media. It's not the people that are going to elect this next president. It's going to be the media. They get on television and these news anchors start flapping their jaws and making their personal predictions and interjecting their personal views and then the public percieves it as fact. Right now, Hillary Clinton's victory's, the media is saying that she shuld bow out. Now, why in the world, after winning 3 out of 4 states, should she bow out? Because the media says so? This is so ridculous. The media is supposed to REPORT THE NEWS and nothing more. They are NOT supposed to sit up there and play god and interject their personal beliefs and then have the public percieve them as fact. It makes me nuts to think how many poeple are going to listen to some "[olitical analyst" and decide that he knows what he is talking about. It's all speculation and should be seen as such. This is complete, out right, blaintent, irresponsibility and they should all be ashamed of themselves.

If, back in 1963, the media were as in your face as they are today, John kennedy wouldnot be the man that everyone wants to quote and be compared to. John Kennedy was the worst kind of womanizer and had more women in and out of the white house than any other president to date, yet we did not know this because the media respected his privacy and would have never thought of exposing this behavior, if they even knew about it. Today it seems that anything goes and I believe it is an awful practice.

It is because of the nosey media and their need for money that Princess Diana is dead; that her sons had to grow upwithout thir mother. The press in this country has ruined more lives than it has helped and I think it is a terrible shame and an injustice to the people they are supposed to serve.

I know all about the free speech laws we have in this country, howeve, I still believe that some limits must be set on the press in this country. They need to respect other peoples privacy and their right to it. We ALL need to remember to treat others as we would like to be treated and this includes the press.

I would love for someone to turn the tables on these horrible people and start snapping pictures of them at every move, take pictures of their children as they leave for school or play on the playground. They would not stand for it for one second, and yet this is exactly what they do to other innocent people simply because they have made a movie or are on television.

Really, who gives a hoot weather Angelina and Brad are having a baby or not? It is no ones business but their own. I heard Sharie Shepard on The View say that we are invested in these peoples lives. We are not INVESTED. We are simply too nosey for our own good. And I belive it is reprehensible and should be stopped!

The Presidential Election

For the life of me, I can't figure out what's wrong with most of the people in this country. Is it me? I don't understand how so many people can get behind this Musslim fool that's running for Presideant. Do poeple not realize that he can say whatever it is that he tinks people want to hear and then once he's in office he's going to do exactlythe opposite? People are yelling now about the government wanting to take God out of everything. What do they think this Musslim is going to do? He doesn't even BELIEVE in God! He bows to a MUSSLIM GOD! What more proof than the fact that he placed his hand on the Koran when he was sworn into the Senate, do people need?
He hides his middle name, which is HUSSAN from people. He refuses to acknowledge his radical Musslim step-father. He says that he was educated in Catholic schools. Come on, TWO years in a Catholic school does not consitiute an education. Where was he educated after that? He was educated by his radical musslim father in musslim schools, for craps sake!
Yes, he has good ides. Yes, he says all the things we are wanting to hear. But honestly, can we trust him? If anyone can say that they trust this Musslim to lead this country, then I am as afradi of them as I am of this liar. I would not trust this jerk any farther than I could throw him.
He has zero experience. He's been a senator for what? All of two years? before that he has never even led a Boy Scout troop and yet he believes he can run this country! Give me a break.
I'll admit I might not be the brightest buld in the carton, but I'm smart enough to know that if this nut is elected we will be worse off than if we allowed The Idiot to stay in office.
It's obvious, by the polls, that not many people agree with me, I know. I've always felt that the popular vote should be the one that counts, but in this case, if this guy is elected by popular note, then I hope and pray that the Super Delegate are smart enough to nominate Hillary for the Democtatic party. At least she HAS been there and DOES have the experience needed to run the country. She's the smart, no nonsense, hard hitting, tough talking kind of person we need. You don;t have to like her personally, but you have to admire her spirit, her tenasity and her spunk. I doubt there is a leader in this world she could not stand up to. Osama Obama looks like he could not stand up to his 3 year old.

This is my opinion and for now, this is still a free country. But if Obama is elected, we can kiss our freedom good bye. He'sll set women's rights back 200 years and I have no doubt that before it's over, he'll have us wearing long black robes and covering our faces. Don't misunderstand. I con't give a hoot that he's black, but I DO care that he's a Musslim. That bothers the hell out of me and it should bother every person in this country.

Just Overwhelmed

I am so overwhelmed right now, with my life, with my house. OMG, this house is dirtier than it has ever been since I have lived here...and trust me, it's been pretty bad. But this mess beats all. I've never seen it where every room is such a disaster that it looks like a tornado blew up in it. And besides, just messy, it's downright dirty. Get down to the nitty gritty dirty, I mean. And I just do not have the strenght, the inclination, ir the motovation to do a damn thing about it. What is it with me? Why can't I seem to get with it? I get so tired of this same thing, day after day, and then it just gets worse, that I don;t know half the time weather to shit or go blind. Some days going blind sounds pretty goo to me, ya' know?

I really want to get my shit together and get busy and clean this house. I know it would make me feel better to sit back and look at it if things looked decently. I just don;t know why I can't seem to get moving on it. I think about it, God knows I talk about it, but I just can't seem to get the old body moving on it. Makes me nuts.

Now we find out that the hot water heater needs to be replaced to the tune of $650.00 Nice, huh? How are we supposed to manage that one? Life is just lovely some days, isn't it?

More Going's On

I've been at Kelle's for nearly a week and I had so much fun! I can't wait to go back. I came home early for two reasons, I didn't bring enough meds with me and I was going to run out and Braxton had a crisis; Ashley broke up with him, again. This is a regular occurance around here and one I am getting tired of, because of the way that he acts when it happens. It's like it is the end of the world. He walks around crying, he can't eat, or sleep and he wants to tll the entire world what has happened. He calls everyone he knows and pours it on. Oh my goodness, it is a terrible thing. Maybe I am just too old for teenage love. Maybe I just do not understand the workings of it anymore. Maybe it's been so long since I have been in love that I just don't know what it si about anymore. It very well be why I don't have the patience for it. I just pray that God gives me the strength to get through this part of raising him. It's been an up and down thing for me since Bud died. Some times we go along and things go well and then other times I worried about screwing up his life terribly. I don't like this parenting solo stuff at all. It's way too hard, knowing that someone else'e life is completely dependent on you. At least when Bud was around he had both of us to lean on and to come to. Now he has only me....to so it all and it is very scary.

I seem to always be at some sort of cross roads in my life. I always seem to be trying to decide what it is that I want, where I want to live, what I want to do. I'm thinking about Aiken again, I miss it. I miss my life there. But I also know that life there would not be the same and would I want that if I got it? Am I better off staying here where I know I have a dr and I know how things are, how life is, I mean. New orleans was such a disaster and I don't want another one of those. I can't live thorugh that again. I just want to be SETTLED and know that I am settled. I don't know why I can't be. I don't know why I can't feel like I belong anywhere. Will I ever feel that there is someplace that I belong? God, I hope so. If i could have any one thing in this whole world it would be to be where I know that I belong. Is that asking too much?

The Past comes Back

About a month or so ago Kelle gave me Christy's My Space address and I went to it. I also wrote her a short note telling her Metty Christmas and I also said that I didn't know if she even wanted to hear from me. It took her almost 3 week to answer me and in her letter she basically spilled her gus. She told me that all her life i had made her feel like she was in the way and an incinvence that I had to deal with once a year when she and Jon came to visit. She also told me that at her daddy's funeral I made her fell awful. Every bit of what she said came as a shock to me. But I sat and thought about her words and tried to see things from her point of view. I wrote her back and told her how sorry I was for the things that I did to her even though they were so unintentional. I never mean to hurt her. The truth is that I have always loved her so very much. I looked forward to her visits all the time. The truth is that I always felt not quite good enough in her eyes all thouse years and probably tried too hard with her.

Now the wonderful thing is that she answered me and told me how good it was to finally get all of that off of her chest and that she wants a relationship with me. She said that she was ina good place with me and Oh my God I can't tell you how good this feels.

We have written several letters back and forth and I am loving getting to know her and her family. She has a four year old boy, Cash!

The Life Lesson here is that I had no idea of the impact I had made in a childs life. I had no idea of the powr that I held in my hands. I needed to be so very careful with the impressions I made with her and with Jon. This is probably true in any relationship. You have to be so very careful of the impression that you leave.

From now on I will take extra care to be careful with the impression that I make on people in my life.

What Am I DOing?

OK here goes, About a week or so ago, I can't remember the exact date, but I got a letter from a guy on My Space. He seemed nice, said he was looking for someone to spend his life with, since he's been alone for 8 years. He seemed really nice so, not to be rude, I wrote him back. I told him very general stuff and was also honest and told him that I was not sure if I was looking for a relationship, that's not what I went on My Space for. Well, the letters continued and almost right away this guy let me know that he wanted a life with me, or at least to explore that possibility. He offered to buy me a laptop because I mentioned that my computer was acting up. Naturally, I would not let him, but I have a feeling that if I asked for anything he would give it to me. I have told him that I would like to meet in New Orleans to meet. I thought that I would want the protection of my children, ya know? Anyway, the weird turn of events is that I find myself thinking about this guy and actually wondering what a life with him would be like. If I compare it to what I have now, it's almost no contest, however at least I know what it is I have now, even though it's not the greatest situation. I don't really know what life would be like with William. I also worry about moving Braxton yet again! My God I have moved that child around so much, especially lately. Since Bud died we moved to the apartment, then to here, then to New Orleans, then back to here. And before we went to the apartment in Laplace, he was living all over the place, or should I say, from place to place, but never with me. OK so he is probably over what happened almost 6 years ago, but what about just last summer when we took off for New Orleans only to turn around four months later and return? I sure could not move him for a while, yet, for some reason I am feeling some urgency. Of course I KNOW that I have to wait and get to know this yahoo MUCH better before I take off half cocked and do yet another stupid thing. I think I just need to continue to write him and see if I can get to know him better and take it from there.
This could be the beginning of huge changes in my life. Yes, I have said that I wanted change, so I guess I am off on some wild journey. I wonder where it will take me.

One of Life's Lessons?

It's January 2nd, 2008. I've been whining about my life being so lonely and quiet for more years than I care to remember. This morning I got a note on my My Space page from some guy. He wants to be frineds. Do I? Part of me says yes and another part says no, I don't need the hassle. But don't I owe it to myself to see what might happen? ANd if I do, what do I say? I can't help but wonder if this could be an omen of some sort. Or is it asking for trouble? This could turn out to be one of Life's Lessons.