Monday, January 14, 2008

The Past comes Back


About a month or so ago Kelle gave me Christy's My Space address and I went to it. I also wrote her a short note telling her Metty Christmas and I also said that I didn't know if she even wanted to hear from me. It took her almost 3 week to answer me and in her letter she basically spilled her gus. She told me that all her life i had made her feel like she was in the way and an incinvence that I had to deal with once a year when she and Jon came to visit. She also told me that at her daddy's funeral I made her fell awful. Every bit of what she said came as a shock to me. But I sat and thought about her words and tried to see things from her point of view. I wrote her back and told her how sorry I was for the things that I did to her even though they were so unintentional. I never mean to hurt her. The truth is that I have always loved her so very much. I looked forward to her visits all the time. The truth is that I always felt not quite good enough in her eyes all thouse years and probably tried too hard with her.

Now the wonderful thing is that she answered me and told me how good it was to finally get all of that off of her chest and that she wants a relationship with me. She said that she was ina good place with me and Oh my God I can't tell you how good this feels.

We have written several letters back and forth and I am loving getting to know her and her family. She has a four year old boy, Cash!

The Life Lesson here is that I had no idea of the impact I had made in a childs life. I had no idea of the powr that I held in my hands. I needed to be so very careful with the impressions I made with her and with Jon. This is probably true in any relationship. You have to be so very careful of the impression that you leave.

From now on I will take extra care to be careful with the impression that I make on people in my life.

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